In Response to "What is Our Sputnik? by Tom Friedman

The unfortunate situation the USA has placed itself in, is like that of the worlds best Golf player Tiger Woods. We had built up a persona as the greatest untouchable super power of the world; and with this ego trip, we decided to lay in many beds with many different "women". Funny enough, all ego centric super powers are always shocked when the walls of their perfect world come crumbling down around them. We can see this not only in the popularity of the Woods scenario, but in all the latest bubble bursting chaos such as the ENRON crisis, the collapse of AIG, the lack of organization with in FEMA during hurricane Katrina, Madoff's Ponzi scheme and all the growing number of participants within our economic downfall. Information now travels faster than ever, and the aftermath of our actions are much more potent, living in such a flattened world.

This relationship has gone bad and has been publicly broadcasted as our walls crumble around us. This can only end in two ways. One being a breakup and the other is trying to save the marriage. Both with their consequences, and each needs to be looked at throughly before making a decision.

Trying to save the marriage?................ Is it for the kids?
Well lets be real, do the kids want to grow up in a hostile environment not knowing what car is safe and which one is loaded with explosives? This whole idea of holding out hardly ever works, no matter what the circumstances are. In most situations one partner becomes the doer of right, and subsequently the other, the doer of wrongs. A therapist and patient, but not in a willing manner; more like that of a psych-ward pairing. And sometimes the energy within this environment is so volatile, that the roles flip and reverse themselves like a WWE wrestling match, where, as outsiders, we question whether or not the whole thing was planned out to begin with.

Trying to keep it together is draining, hard work. There is never time to sleep or retreat, never time to sit still and regather oneself; but rather minutes filled with plotting and questioning. Creative thinking to manipulate the situation to get things back to the way they where or move past the betrayal. Hours crammed with thinking, only to realize, if you don't give up your stance, holding your ground could result in the break-up you are so carefully trying to avoid.

What this eventually boils down to is acceptance. The only clear way to "save the marriage", acceptance is like reaching the peak on Mt Everest. A brutal journey, with a triumphant end that last for a brief moment before having to traverse back down the ever deadly mountain side. Only to go back to a level ground and deal with everyday problems, all the while never forgetting the peak you climbed.

Second, the idea of breaking up; but with who? We have been playing "extra friendly neighbor" to too many places. Saying that we are devoted to one would be the equivalent to a child promising to never do something ever again.... ever. So within every breakup, we need to weigh the consequences of what might happen. Some breakups are done out of anger, others out of want and still others are done in the dark of the night to escape from the abusive partner. In any situation both parties begin to reel with anger, frustration, self-worth or self-worthlessness, the persistence of memories, and the question of how or why did this happen. That said, there could be a response or back-lash for the lose, or even a complete cutting of ties. Depending upon the type of person, their thought processes, their understanding of the world and their basic psychological homeostasis, the aftermath could look like newly tilled land or a nuclear waste site.

The break-up though usually results, overtime, in a redefinition of oneself no matter what side you where on. It forces you to regain a balance on your own and question your ethics, integrity, ideals and over all trajectory.

I agree with Friedman, that we need to break-up with our, once thought feeble, partners and let them stand on their own. We have been hindering them as well as ourselves in these lengthy relationships. Lets take sometime to reinvent ourselves, and learn from the progress made between China and Taiwan. We need to stop trying to make this toxic relationship with the Middle East and else where, work and instead just accept our losses, lick our wounds and maybe get some therapy. It is time for us to redefine our trajectory and stop, "building bridges to nowhere".